All You Bastards!


I've had enough of these bastards who inflict themselves upon my life. Instead of just doing their own thing and leaving the rest of us out of it.  They have to just screw with us out of some twisted need which I cannot fathom.


So in retaliation, I am posting the biggest winners up on this site.  I present to you, winner number one, car alarm bastard.


This kind of bastard likes to install a car alarm that is at least 10,000 times more sensitive than needed.  It goes off when a monkey farts in Uganda.  Imagine the joy of trying to sleep with this happy sound generator outside your window.  Now imagine that the owner of the car is nowhere to be found at 2am and the alarm has been going off since 9pm.

 Eventually, at about 3 or 4am, the car was towed by the police.  But not after I left a little love note for the bastard.



It read:

Roses are red,

The green grass gets mowed.

Turn off your goddamned alarm,

or I'll have your shit towed.

Incredibly, the prediction came true, and the car "PHRIDM" got to spend a night in jail.  God, that has to be the worse license plate spelling I ever saw.  And just to remove any doubt you may have about the tortured I endured.  Here is the video of what I had to deal with all freakin' night long.

Footage of car alarm bastards car in action.


Please stay tuned for more bastards.  they never stop coming!